Happy birthday

Pardon the shitty photos. They were taken a year ago and the lighting sucks  .


HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, BESTFRIEND. ♥

It's 17 June today, and its your bithday. I'm writing a freaking blogpost for you, so you better be grateful cause my comp is fucking lagging and its really difficult for me to type it all out. PLUS, i'm not gonna be like the rest and just send you a 140 word tweet, wishing you happy birthday. First of all, i want to thank you, thank you for being such a amazing and truly caring friend. I'll never forget how we first met, from the quarell over a stupid class tee shirt design on facebook. Hilarious shit, and its amazing to know how fast time passes. Thank you for being the greatest listening ear ever, i'll never forget how everytime whenever i was upset, angry or having a rough time, you'd be the first person to rush down to meet me just to cheer me up or talk on the phone with me on hours on end, you never never fail to be there whenever i need you even when you were in Dubai and you specially called me just to check if i'm fine. :') I'm so happy that you're my bestfriend cause i couldn't ask for any better bestfriend other than you. I know i haven't been a perfect and ideal bestfriend, always taking our friendship for granted and contacting you as and when i like and always making you rush down to meet me at the last minute (sentosa and many others). In fact i've been a lousy bestfriend. Sorry. You're the only one that i trust wholeheartedly (must be honoured ok bcus i rarely trust people) because NEVER once have you ever let me down. You're always the one putting in the effort in this friendship. You were there at my fucking lowest and you have no idea how grateful i am to have a friend like you. I STILL HAVE THE SUPER SUPER SUPER HUGE BEAR YOU GAVE ME FOR MY BIRTHDAY LAST YEAR. I know that recently we've drifted and i've become a changed person, for the worst. I'm going against everything i used to believe in, i've become someone i thought i'll never be, and i have no idea how but i know i'll try to change for the better. I'm glad that i've become so much stronger now, that i don't have to rely on you to always be there for me anymore , at least it'll lessen your burden (HAHA OK I KNOW I V TROUBLESOME OK). You're one of the few rare people who actually mean it when they say "I'm always be there if you ever need me" because by far, you've really stucked by my side thru both ups and downs. I have so many happy and valuable memories of our friendship, its a fucking rarity you'll find a true friend nowadays I truly thank god for the fact that 15 years ago, you were born, and that you entered my life because my life has been better ever since i met you. :')

P/s: Forgive me for the really really late post because my laptop is seriously hanging like shit, and i couldnt wait till tomorrow to tell you this thats why i'm posting this right now despite the lag. FORGIVE ME OK.

Happiness shall bind me.

"When one person stops trying in a relationship, that's when everything starts to fall apart." 
  

Met Eliza and Jared today, just for a little catch up. Got my tongue re-pierced, such a impulsive decision. Couldn't speak properly, worst off having pastamania for lunch was a total hassle! Took damn long to eat, and guess what, in the end i didn't manage to finish my meal... Eliza and Jared must've had fun laughing at me, watching me having difficulty eating and talking properly. HOW MEAN. In case anyone's wondering, they're not a couple, don't be mistaken!



Been lazing around so much lately, it's almost the end of the holidays and i haven't started on my work yet. How time flies. Used to be so neat and studious. Ok, must study tomorrow for sure, have to stop procrastinating really!!!! MUST MUST MUST. I guess i'll be meeting Germaine ong tomorrow for some studying and catch up session, how i miss my bestfriend. "True friendship isn't based on how many times you see each other, but the comfort and ease of telling each other your deepest and darkest secrets without the fear of being betrayed. True friendship is when you can still feel as close as ever, even if you haven't met each other for months" How true. Can't believe the rate which i'm spending, splurging on practically everything. SIGH, someone should just teach me to save up, how i wish i had unlimited cash. Fat hope...



I'm having so many mixed thoughts and emotions now. Sometimes i really wonder why i get affected and upset by one's insincerity and lack of effort. It's like we're falling in this place where both parties aren't willing to back down. Makes me wonder why i'm willing to put in the effort for people who never seem to appreciate it, and instead take it for granted.

Oh well, shall update later on this week. Goodnight xo. "It sucks when people hold on to that pain too long that they become totally judgemental and pessimistic about everything" @sxcasian

Heart on the line

Hanna & I last year @ East Coast (pardon the small eyes, the sun was too bright)

Dear Hanna, you're a beautiful and talented girl with loads of potential, I'm utterly grateful and blessed to have a friend like you, really treasure our friendship, and thank you for the amazing memories we shared. I will miss you when you leave Singapore and i reallyyyyyy hope we'll still stay in contact and that you can come to visit us in Singapore in the future. You're truly amazing,
I love you, Hanna Giselle Thompson ♥

Ok, school's out and yes my results are out too. Didn't do well this time round, in fact my level position dropped, absolutely did not put in ANY effort, and i can say i'm rather disappointed with myself. I realized i have a tendency to feel extremely bitter about the fact that others are doing so much better than myself. I don't like the feeling of losing, in fact i HATE it. Whatever, shall do better in the next exam. Sick of the disputes between my parents and i, i'm not used to the sudden display of affection and concern over my well being, it's a rarity to come home everyday to feel comfortable with the thought of "home sweet home" on my mind. Oh well, it doesn't even feel like its the holidays, especially due to the fact that my freedom has been restricted and the heavy burden of the mental reminder to myself that i have to sacrifice more time for my academics instead of just wasting my time, having fun. Anyway its my brother's birthday today.

Lazy Sunday today, was down with a really bad cramp and headache, read a new book, House Rules by Jodi Picoult. Must say it was rather draggy but the story was not bad. My vocabulary and english seems to be deproving, this is bad, i should start studying harder and reading up more. Daddy got me a little present from Japan despite our huge fight, and i can say that i'm really touched. Sometimes its the smaller actions and gestures people do, that has more significance and meaning behind it. I think about what my parents go through and everything they did to bring me up and i can understand why they want a better disciplined daughter who fares well in academics and in life I'm so easily angered and irritable these days, its like everything is simply pissing me off. Oh well, it's my bestfriend, Patrick's birthday tomorrow, hooray to 3 years of friendship.
lol i miss my gay baby haha ♥

Brand new start

Just revived my old and dead blogger, after 2 miserable years. Decided to delete all my 300+ posts from before, furthermore, recalling the me from 2-4 years back just brought back so many bad memories. So here i am, brand new start, afresh.

It's the mid years once again, to think that 5 months passed so fast, almost half a year, and i've done absolutely nothing. Pathetic and aimless life i lead. Contemplated to revive my blogger, partly due to wanting to have a quick get-away from the hectic and messy life of mine. Ah... I have a really bad flu and migraine, my head hurts so bad. Ok so today was E-Maths paper 2 and A-Maths, i'm gonna fail really badly this time round, due to my endless procrastination and lack of motivation. I wonder where did the me from a year back, went? The one who was so constantly happy and motivated, to always do my best for myself and for everyone around me. This time round, i can't afford to think like that anymore. Call me selfish, but the only person that i'm able to do my best for, is myself. Afterall, so many experiences, only taught me that in this world, the only person i can rely and count on, is myself. Nobody's gonna stick with me through out, i'm responsible for my own happiness and future. Everything and everyone around me, is temporary. "Leave before everyone else leaves, make sure you're your own priority beause no one else can treat you better, than you treat yourself" An important lesson learnt, glad that i've finally got that drilled into my brain. With my inability to trust anyone around me, i've spared myself from all the redundant hurt and pain, turns out to be a blessing in disguise. Ok too much for the first post.

I'm ending off with a picture of my dog, that i missed so bad. The only happy memory i can recall, back from the past. How i miss her.